Philippa and Rick Hornsey during a happier time when they were first reunited after years apart

Philippa and Rick Hornsey during a happier time when they were first reunited after years apart

An adult with a good job in the civil service, Philippa was within her rights to defy her parents, but she admits she was cowed by their dominance over her.
‘They made it clear they were ashamed of me and threatened to throw me out if I tried to keep my child. They said I’d lose my job and end up homeless.
‘Although I objected strongly when my mother began making adoption arrangements, no one would listen to me. 

Family resemblance: Tony, aged three

‘Even the social worker assigned to my case, who’d said she would help me, abandoned me when she came up against my mother.
‘I felt so helpless and alone. I’d lie in bed at night sobbing as I felt my baby kick and prayed Mum and Dad would change their minds.’
Cruelly, by coincidence, Philippa’s older — and married — sister was pregnant, too, just a few months further along.
‘I watched my parents fuss over her and buy things for the baby, while my pregnancy wasn’t even discussed,’ she recalls. ‘When my niece was born, they adored her. I did, too — and it made me yearn to keep my child even more.’
Philippa gave birth alone in Orsett Hospital, near her home, in August 1981. Her parents never visited her or their grandson once, although her sister did.
Initally, the baby, whom she called Robert David, was taken to the hospital nursery, and Philippa tried to keep away, terrified she’d fall in love with him.
After 48 hours, however, she cracked, and sneaked off to hold him: ‘I counted his fingers and toes, just like any other new mother does. He was perfect in every way. I told him I loved him, and would always love him.’
But the following day, when she tried to see her baby again, he’d already been taken away. ‘I didn’t have a clue where he was or even have a picture of him. Everyone just kept saying it was for the best.’
Back at home, Philippa sank into depression. Her son was never mentioned, and a bitter rift developed between her and her parents.
It was another five years before Philippa found the strength to leave home, after which she rarely went back to visit.
When she was 32, Phili